Many dialogues in a psychotherapist’s office during family counseling can be summarized and presented in a kind of collective image typical of modern visitors to the offices of psychologists, psychotherapists, analysts... - Are you not sleeping with your wife? Well, yes... You see, we have a little son..... He screams, cries and does not let everyone sleep if his mother is not around...... - Does your child decide who, where to sleep? - We can’t do anything except tried......What's going on? Who is the boss in the family? A 3 or 5 year old son screams and the parents obey. The Son presented to the Father his rights to possess the Mother, and indicates the “place” to the Father. How hard it is to part with the Mother, with her almost total presence and care. Most often, sons like this care. And how can you let the Mother go to the Father and be left alone? Alone, the son will have to cope with his feelings, especially his fears. Parents' comforting words reduce anxiety, but do not eliminate it. It is easiest for a son to cope with his fears (feelings) when the parents have coped with their experiences. Naturally, as the son grows up, the distance between mother and son will increase. (Now he is already left alone in the room... there is a rustling sound outside the door, shadows flickering outside the window... What is this?) The child copes with the frightening reality with the help of a fantasy in which something threatens or may encroach on his life. (Someone stronger than him may wish him something terrible, maybe punishment for something?). But the calm and confident behavior of the Father, the kind and patient care of the Mother for his independence (You already did it yourself!), help the baby gradually overcome his fears. (I am myself! And the Mother likes it, and the Father approves of it. Life is good!). If we are talking about the fact that the child is learning to overcome fears and seeks the approval of his parents. And if we are talking about the fact that he has already “seized” power , then you can forget about peace in the family. If a 3-month-old baby screams and when a rattle or a dry diaper appears, he believes that he rules the world and somehow magically everything appears and everyone manifests itself. As soon as he closes his eyes, the world disappears, he only has to puff and what he needs appears... However, what if this is done by a three-year-old child and his parents confirm his fantasies about the omnipotent ruler of the world?! Is he the ruler of peace and tranquility in the family? And he tests this with his hysterics, whims, screams, and the parents accept this attitude and give up. He already realizes that the world works differently, but he is trying to leave the old “infant” world, where the mother undividedly belonged only to him (in his fantasies this is so). And what should parents do when their child screams? What does this cry mean? What is the meaning of the parents' reaction? If there is a struggle for power, then the one to whom the power really belongs usually behaves confidently..... and to the one who is weaker and does not pose a threat - he is lenient, but does not give up power (especially to small children play). Whatever decisions parents make, they must maintain their parental position, which, as you know, is based on love and law. Does your child still cry at night, and you don’t sleep with your wife because of it? Do you want it to be different? Come for a consultation, sometimes situations are far from simple……